5/15-16-17/2013
the Mystery of Lust
In the dark of deep night
I want to have her
to own her body
to possess it
I want to become engorged
and penetrate every orifice,
and I want, I used to suspect, to sin
I need to dominate
to control
to satisfy any sexual hunger
I don’t always want to romance
or to be gentle
or tender
or slow
or careful
what is most worst
is this Hunger
this Lust
this near unfathomable need
includes wanting her to give in to me
completely of her own free will
I need her surrender
her submission
her yin to my yang
I need her to want to be dominated
and hungered for
in all the raw ways possible
everything I can ask
she must choose to give
yet, this is not about debasement
how can Lust debase what is freely given?
nor is it about power
I want no power over her at all
for I too want to surrender
to give into the Lust
to embrace the untempered Hunger
yet not be there, in that dark seeming place
of raw Lust
- alone
I want, need, her company
in the dark deeps of the night
when the Hunger is aroused
Not only that I want her to urge
me on
take me she must say
have me she must say
possess me
own me
she is to open to me
to spread her arms and her legs
and lay back
and tell me to penetrate her
devour her
my hungry mouth
everywhere
or she turns herself over
and demands
I go into her
from behind
the Lust
must burn through both of us
taking away all inhibitions
all resistance
for in this burning the Lust is pure some way ...
how can that be?
a primal power of the creation is appearing
a need for uniting that overcomes all reluctance
where the resisting mind fades away
and the body itself surrenders
to all sensation both inner and outer
to all urgent demand
to plant the seed
within her
to plow her
and plunder her
and shower her
nor is this a gesture of animalness
this is the urge for pure generation
for combining egg and seed
electric and magnetic and atomic
is this desire, this Lust, this Hunger
this is not sin in fact
but something holy
something divine
we are making something together ...
we are making a new body
a new avatar
for a new person
to inhabit
for the fire of the Lust comes
also from outside us
from the spirit of the child who needs and wants
a physical body in which to be born
there are three of us here now
we two, male and female
past and present
making a beginning place
a first iteration of a house
meant to become a temple
for the mystery of the future-other
the one who can’t come from their star
and descend into
incarnation
until we surrender to its Lust
for earthly life
that flows over and around us
penetrating us
this Other-Hunger wants to
have us
to own us
to possess us
and needs us to submit to
he/she/it
the gate into physical life
is through Lust,
through the overriding
all consuming
Hunger of the spirit to
be in flesh
Even the Gods knew this, for the poet sang:
And the Word became Flesh and dwelt among us
Is not each child to be born
its own spirit/word?
no wonder St. Paul
feared the power of the Hunger
the freedom of the physical earthly body
to surrender to the non-earthly spirit
to submit to the needs of the body
seemed to him to give up his power and freedom,
not realizing that nothing that exists
is outside of Gods’ Love, in all their holy glory
so then did the Church too
born in Paul’s confusion
Lust was a power
they sought to control but could not
so they stole it for a time,
from nuns and monks
and made little fake temples they
called monasteries and nunneries,
but which were not true temples
for their purpose was to possess
the Lust,
to transmute and transform it and
to own its generative and creative powers thus changed
for the Church itself
without the captured primal passions of the Religious,
the Church had no moral heart
the primal Hunger of life to begat life
was given no room for its natural expression,
and in the end this coerced celibacy
could not defeat the holy and sacred
nature of Lust for Life,
yet by the Church’s capture was so deformed and transmuted
it became in some a true source of evil
masked as love
the Church also sought to confine
procreation to the marriage bed
but Lust was not to be bound
or controlled there either
when the spirit needed to incarnate in matter
it came, regardless of authorities
lost in fear or the need to dominate
which is why men and women came sometimes to fear it
to fear to surrender to it,
and began to name something holy
and so powerful a sin
but the old goddess religions knew this power,
knew the significance of generation
celebrated it,
and embraced it
we moderns think to call the priestesses
and priests of the holy arts of Lust
temple prostitutes
and from our warped time and point of view
made of Lust and raw desire
something wrong
when the patriarchs took social control
thousands of years ago, and manufactured
the monotheistic religions dominated by
male gods
then did maleness through fear of the generative spirit,
fear of Lust,
and its threefold partnership:
male, female and incarnating child
introduced then all the horrible distortions
of holy human sexuality
that we call porn
or abortions
or contraception
or genital mutilation
Oh, the Churches tried,
the religions tried
the male dominated priesthoods tried
but the primal powers of creation
were not theirs to possess
Lust belongs to itself,
and we can only surrender to it
and submit in wonder
and in awe
when in freedom the male and the female
through arts of mutual provocation and intoxication
let in the Hunger
of the incarnating spirit
seeking a body in which to enter into earthly existence
so it can rush earthward headlong from its star
toward the stage of life
this world, and the needed company of
we billions
so as to dance and sing
and play
while He reminds us gently of this truth of innocence ...
lest ye become again as little children, ye cannot enter the kingdom of heaven
for Lust is adult play of the highest sort
a surrender to the world of sensation
which is also part of the Creation
We were not made to suffer
to resist the impulses for pleasure and joy
why else do we sing and dance in the temples
and shout and praise
the body is a temple,
lent to us by acts of Lust,
we are all from a father and a mother
we are all from our own star
seemingly hellbent to enter into the earth existence
to enter into the deeps of the body
but being not yet perfect
we descend partial and often lame
of soul
the Hunger of the spirit
for incarnation in the avatar
temple of the physical body
includes the need to learn
to master self
to become something more
so we want to temper Lust and
hope that at its root it is Love,
which as a truth is surely divinely real
for the divine does not create in error ...
ever
even we humans do not error in the sense of sin,
we only make the mistakes of the unlearned,
the not yet wise ...
so the Lust and the Hunger
the joining of male and female
and child to be
in the generative act of procreation
is such a primal power that it cannot
and will not be confined by human
religious hectoring, which is too much Beam
and almost no Mote at all
the Divine Mystery knows not rules
so why would it decree we adhere
to laws and commandments
an act the patriarchs of the monotheistic
religions decreed a sin in their twisted lust
for power and domination
over women
jealous of women’s power
to carry the child’s growing temple in their womb
and to be naturally a principle source of love
for this incarnating spirit-child during its whole life
these old men lorded their self-loved pain
over women, repressed them, for millennia
but the spirit cannot be repressed
cannot be stilled,
so today, in our Age
Lust bursts forth its chains and
women will not accept control of their
bodies, their temples
for their instinct is sure that something holy
is at risk,
and the twisted lusts of men for domination
must be fought ...
or all of us, male and female and child
will be ruined,
and hate of the temple of the body
will be thus fostered,
and hate of the independence of the spirit
will be thus fostered ...
and the modern World of we-billions
drowns in the raging seas of Karma
such that
a civilization must Fall to make room
for the next one
the Goddess religions honored the Father God,
but the godless monotheistic religions dishonored
the Mother God,
thus founding Western Civilization on a great Lie,
one so great that the Lord of the Dance Himself
had to come and die on a Cross
to lead us all toward Redemption
the Redemption of Eros,
the true name
of Lust and the Hunger for unity
of the primal power of generation
to overcome separation
and help us seek a World made whole
and Holy once more
yet, why then abortion and porn
and genital dis-figuration and rape
and all the other crimes against women?
Because the ever and again incarnating spirit
voyaging the ages and times from past to present
and into future - this reincarnating spirit, going from
one physical body avatar to another ...
learns only through strife and struggle
so that in our Age, we are faced
in the most direst of ways with
deep questions of moral confusion ...
the Lust and the Hunger, once managed
through social do’s and don’ts are now
ours alone to discipline ... and we will
only learn their mastery by trial and error
and through the alchemy of ups and downs
and choices ...
we are to be personally responsible for
what Eros, what Lust and the Hunger -
what the generative power of the creation -
does in our lives ...
these are our choices, and no religion
or any science can deny our freedom to determine
and rule them by ourselves ...
the gravitas of life is ours now to know ...
a great gift, in a mystery dance often
only captured in verse and song:
an “Amazing Grace” for all.
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.